When I read advice columns in the newspaper, I wonder what drives someone to write to a stranger for advice. But now I find myself tempted to do the same.
Except I’m not reaching out to strangers. I’m reaching out to you, my S’Wagger friends. Should I be worried about my husband?
Let me lay out the facts.
I’ve noticed an increasing number of blonde hairs on the bed. But now they’re showing up on the pillow cases too.
In the middle of the night, I feel strange movements. And the bed is getting more crowded.
We used to have a nightly routine. My husband and I would go to bed early and read for a little while. Honey, my golden retriever, would settle in at the foot of the bed until we were ready to turn the lights out. Then my husband would give her a treat and send her to sleep in her crate to help me sleep through the night, uninterrupted by kidney punches and floofies up my nose.
But something has changed.
The other morning I woke up, looked over, and saw a big fuzzy head with floppy ears on my husband’s pillow. My hubby was sleeping a foot lower on the bed. He said he was worried that Honey minded the fireworks. And he didn’t want to move her around and risk waking me up. But I don’t know.
The past two nights, when he finished reading, my husband just went to sleep. No treat for Honey. No trip to the crate.
I’m beginning to wonder if he thinks I should sleep in the crate to make more room for Honey to stretch out on the bed.
If he starts coaxing me in that direction with a cookie, I guess I’ll have my answer.
Besides Honey taking my space on the bed, I’ve also caught her in compromising positions with my husband. It looks like love to me. And I don’t think I have a chance of getting in between.
I certainly can’t compete. Not with those long, golden locks and legs (four of them!) that don’t quit.
So what do you think? Should I be worried about my husband? Is it time for me to move my favorite pillow into the crate? Or should I just share him without complaining while knowing that someday he’ll return to his first love when he needs someone with opposable thumbs?
I’m counting on you, S’Waggers. Let me know what I should do.
Displaced by the Dog
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