People are always talking about how much work it takes to have a dog. You have to walk them, groom them, clean up after them.
I don’t think it’s hard work. I think we just need a way to make dog chores fun.
A Spin Doctor Makes Dog Chores Fun
Remember when used cars became pre-owned? When prunes became dried plums?
Dog chores just need their own spin doctor (or in my case, a spin nurse practitioner) to make things sound fun.
Wouldn’t you enjoy walking a dog more if you called it taking a puppy adventure?
Is picking up poop less disgusting if you call it carrying hand warmers?
Wouldn’t you rather have a mani pedi session with the girls than clip the dog’s nails?
Doesn’t being on the lookout for things that make your reactive dog explode or cower in fear sound much better when you call it commando training?
What if buffalo-choking, pet hair tumbleweeds became dog wool that will someday make a great sweater?
How about calling a late night vomit clean up a gastronomic exploration?
Why not tell people your humping dog is just showing amorous intent?
Would evacuating your dog’s anal glands be more tolerable if you called it canine dorsal massage?
Isn’t it more exciting to practice canine cuisine than it is to thaw chicken necks in the sink for raw feeding?
Wouldn’t you prefer having an intimate connection to nature to deskunking your dog?
You see what I mean, don’t you? Dog chores sound much more fun when you add the right spin.
So the next time someone asks what you’re doing for the weekend, tell them you’re going for a puppy adventure and feeling sure that a recent waste bin spelunking session will result in a late night gastronomic exploration. They’ll think having a dog sounds fun. At least until they figure out you’re taking a walk and hoping that your dog’s spreading the trash contents all over the floor doesn’t cause him to throw up in the middle of the night.
Your Turn: What terrible dog chore would you like to make more fun? Between the other S’Waggers and myself, maybe we can help you with some positive spin.
Repeat After Me. She’s. Not. My. Dog.
It’s the poop patrol…not sure we could ever spin that enough to make it fun.
Well, the White House Easter Egg roll is all about playing with chicken fetuses. There’s gotta be something to make poop pick up sexy.
You’re post is great!! Don’t know about the hand warmers thing though but I LOVE the name “Gastronomic Exploration” and the next time I deskunk Noah, I’ll think of it as bonding!
I’m blessed as I don’t have any bothersome dog chores. Noah and I explore our life together and take care of each other as we do. That’s not to say, that I have no chores, just that they are part of being a Dog Dad!
And just being a Dog Dad is the best spin of all. 🙂
The unending trips outside through the night that Flattery thinks she needs every night would be the top of my chore list! Nocturnal exploration sounds better, but it’s still a pain in the rear!
Send your husband out and call it foreplay? 🙂
Combing fleas out of foster puppy’s belly… that would be my terrible chore (although, thankfully, she’s all clear now).
Did that count as a wildlife safari?
Keeping Torrey brushed and free from little sticks and other plant based hitchhikers. Any ideas?
Honey has the same problem. A little while ago, she had a foot long stick tangled in the fur behind her ears. Luckily, it entranced our foster puppy Ginny.
I’m thinking it’s just a found art project. 🙂
lol! Lipstick on a pig… ?
The chore I truly need to be more diligent with is grooming – brushing away foliage picked up on walks and dried drool.
Perhaps I could sugar coat it with reference to a doggy spa day or a dog walk retrospective? Suggestions welcome!
Not sure I can top your spin. Perhaps a reference to looking for icicles? Because surely even Newf drool freezes in the temps we’ve been having lately.
You bet it does! Proof from Tuesday night: https://twitter.com/ThatJenK/status/420792069368459265/photo/1
Honestly, Mom says there really isn’t anything aside from trying to groom me that she finds to be a chore. Cats, everyone says are easy, but Mom says they are so much more work than us dogs and they can’t even really be trained to do things. Back to naming things, we have called out long two hour Sat. morning walks our Sat. Adventure Walks for a long time now. It keeps people from thinking we are crazy for walking so long.
And with squirrels around that need chasing, aren’t all walks adventures?
These are hilarious!
Mummy says its a toss up between being woken up in the middle of the night to out to do my business, and doing a ‘garden sweep’ the morning after!
I listen to podcasts while picking up dog po0p in the yard. It’s not my favorite chore AT ALL but I also can’t stand the idea of leaving it out there so 2x a week, I make sure my iPod is charged up and I take my time cleaning up the yard. It takes less than 1 podcast to finish, but by the time I’m finished, I’m so into the podcast that I kind of forget that I just spent 20 minutes shoveling up poop – LOL.
LOL! I love commando training for Pierson. How about hunting for dust bunnies for sweeping the floor? Getting a makeover for grooming? Enhancing the canines for teeth brushing? 🙂
Mom finds giving me a bath and drying and brushing me the biggest pain. She said SHE needs a spa day After that. She doesn’t even try to brush my teeth.
Actually, I don’t really mind the “chores”. The only things I hate doing are those the pups don’t like. Such as pillination. But with Cookie it’s easy by hiding pills in food stuffs. Jasmine wasn’t fooled that easily.
I am so stealing commando training – that’s brilliant! Um any ideas as how to put a positive spin on putting your dog in some form of choke hold to try and cut the mats out of his fur, because despite being sat and brushed often, with plenty of treats, as a puppy your dog runs and hides under the table every time you go to the area where his brush is stored?
Can I just clarify at no point was he choked or put in any danger at all – re read that and suddenly looked like he was being punished. He was not, just trying to hold him still so that we don’t nick him with the scissors!
Oh, yes, commando training is perfect! I’m stealing it, too! My one dreaded chore is removing those darn little poopies that sometimes don’t make it all the way to the ground and get stuck in the nether-fur. Perhaps we could coin “dingleberry picking” or “clingon battle?”