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Blog More... Humor My Dog Is Trying to Kill Me

My Dog Is Trying to Kill Me

May 29, 2012 //  by Pamela

Stuffed Purple Elephant
What caught my eye while taking the laundry downstairs. Not so menacing, right?

 

Purple Stuffed Elephant
Wait for it.

 

Purple Stuffed Elephant on the steps
{cue dramatic music} dunh, dunh, dunnnnnnnnhhh!

 

Honey must think I have lots of this.

 

Honey the Golden Retriever
Does this look like the face of a cold-hearted killer?

 

If a few days go by and you haven’t heard from me, call the FBI. I’m probably lying dead at the bottom of the stairs after slipping on a stuffie, carefully disguised in dog hair. You’ll probably find Honey charging up my credit card.
I knew I should have never taught her how to order online.
[Photo of money from Flickr.]

Category: Humor, More...

Previous Post: « The Puppiness Project – Don’t Be Afraid to Show Affection
Next Post: Lyrical Wordless Wednesday – To All the Dogs I’ve Loved Before »

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Georgia Little Pea

    May 29, 2012 at 7:43 AM

    I know for a fact our dogs are all plotting to kill us or at least twist our ankles with their strategically placed toys. Stay vigilant Pamela!

  2. houndstooth

    May 29, 2012 at 8:31 AM

    Oh, what a dastardly plot! It’s hard for me to think of Honey as that calculating and cold-hearted, though!

  3. Jodi

    May 29, 2012 at 9:31 AM

    It’s hard for me to think of someone named ‘Honey’ in that way and since I know of her love for people I’m thinking SHE might not be the culprit.

    In your previous post you mentioned you forgot your anniversary……maybe Mike is the real culprit and trying to make it look like Honey. :0

    I hope you know I’m just kidding. 🙂

  4. Kristine

    May 29, 2012 at 10:05 AM

    That looks more like something a cat would do, not a sweet dog like Honey.

    We are constantly tripping over bones in our living room. I know one of these days I am going to break my foot when I accidently step on one!

  5. Leslie

    May 29, 2012 at 11:24 AM

    I agree with Kristine – it’s the cat! Honey’s being framed!

    Oh wait, you don’t have a cat…

    Uh, okay, I got nothing. 😉

  6. Jen

    May 29, 2012 at 11:55 AM

    I think most “pet mystery” stories involve the dog helping to solve the crime, not committing it in the first place!

    That said, Gumby has almost been the end of me a few times.

  7. Jan

    May 29, 2012 at 1:27 PM

    She must have been reading some cat manuals.

  8. KimT

    May 29, 2012 at 1:48 PM

    I strongly suspect a dog or cat here strategically did “something” to cause my slip and subsequent broken wrist. You’re on to something here – and now we’ll have to be twice as vigilant since they’ll surely realize! Sneaky little devils…stay safe!

  9. Amy@GoPetFriendly

    May 29, 2012 at 2:15 PM

    She knows you’re the source of the treats, right? Surely, you must have done something to upset her – I just can’t imagine a harsh thought running through Honey’s sweet, furry head!

  10. Roberta

    May 29, 2012 at 6:28 PM

    But, but, just look at that sweet, innocent face! To quote a TV show “be careful out there.”

  11. Julie

    May 29, 2012 at 10:14 PM

    It’s better than stepping in cat puke at 3:00 in the morning – maybe. I’m sure Honey is completely innocent 🙂

  12. Lynda

    May 29, 2012 at 10:55 PM

    How can you look at that innocent face and think Honey is planning something diabolical?

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