Comments on: The Puppiness Project – Stop Feeling so Guilty

By: didiwright

didiwright — Wed, 02 Mar 2011 10:50:43 +0000

I’ve just seen this post – that serves me right for not checking out my favourite blogs often enough! Gosh, I feel guilty now!
You make such an important point here. I think a lot of us fight feelings of guilt at least sometimes in our lives, and if you analyse it, these are very often related to silly things that shouldn’t worry us in the first place. Who cares if I’ve burnt the food, not replied to a message or crossed the road to avoid my nosy neighbour? None of these will have long term harmful events on the universe.
I remember that, when I was a child, I once lost a small amount of money that my mum had sent me to the shops with to buy some milk. I came home crying, and when my mum asked me what was wrong, I said that I was feeling guilty for losing the money. She smiled and called me a silly girl for crying over insignificant things. She said that it’s only worth feeling guilty if you’ve done bad things that affect other people. Otherwise, your worries and guilt will stop you from living a happy and fulfilling life. I wasn’t sure what she was on about then, but I understand it better now. Your post has just reminded me of that. Thank you.

Didi

P.S. I’ve just taken a look at George who’s asleep in his dad’s chair. He looks happy and doesn’t seem to be feeling at all guilty that he brought a bucketful of mud into the house this morning. Maybe I should look at him more often.

By: Pamela

Pamela — Tue, 01 Mar 2011 12:13:21 +0000

In reply to Amy@GoPetFriendly. Yeah, Amy. That's a great idea--you are so right that we can't play and be guilty at the same time. Yet another reason to Look to the Dog.

By: Pamela

Pamela — Tue, 01 Mar 2011 12:12:42 +0000

In reply to houndstooth4. Good for you! You've incorporated the lesson that we all need to learn. Now, if you could teach that, I guarantee you'd become a millionaire in a very short time. I'm hearing from several women commenting on this post who would probably sign up for the webinar.

By: Pamela

Pamela — Tue, 01 Mar 2011 12:11:16 +0000

In reply to georgia little pea.

I’m holding out hope that getting older will help. I have some really spunky women friends in their 50s who seem to be moving in that direction. And I have one friend in her late 70s who has absolutely eliminated guilt. She says and does what she pleases. She says she’s too old to worry about what other people think.

If only we could learn those lessons faster.

As the spouse of a “guilt-ridden” hubby, I can’t agree with your P.S. across the board. But the guilt definitely takes a different path.

By: Pamela

Pamela — Tue, 01 Mar 2011 12:08:32 +0000

In reply to Lori R.. Boy, it's a good thing I decided to reply to my comments this morning. I was just thinking about robbing a liquor store. :)

By: Pamela

Pamela — Tue, 01 Mar 2011 12:07:34 +0000

In reply to Deborah Flick. And of course, we'll both fall off the wagon when we forget. That's why we need to Look to the Dog for wisdom.

By: Pamela

Pamela — Tue, 01 Mar 2011 12:06:59 +0000

In reply to erica. This is such a big topic. We could probably start a "guilt blog" and never run out of things to write.

By: Amy@GoPetFriendly

Amy@GoPetFriendly — Tue, 01 Mar 2011 08:16:36 +0000

Great post, Pamela! Guilt is a complete waste of energy. I’m with you – let’s be as kind and forgiving to ourselves as we are to others. And, until we break the feeling guilty habit, let’s vow to play with our dogs whenever that fun suck sneaks in … because we can’t play and feel guilty at the same time!

By: houndstooth4

houndstooth4 — Tue, 01 Mar 2011 02:43:18 +0000

Okay, I feel weird, because I’m not much of a guilt carrier. I guess that when I really am guilty of something, I am pretty hard on myself, but I don’t look for things to feel guilty about. I grew up with some serious emotional manipulators and I just reached a point where I had to distance myself from a lot of that, I guess. I always think of myself as a work in progress with room for improvement, but I’ve learned that if I’m not kind to myself, nobody else will be.

By: georgia little pea

georgia little pea — Tue, 01 Mar 2011 00:23:06 +0000

today, i feel guilty that i haven’t been reading or commenting on any blog for a couple of days. i feel guilty that i’ll probably be too tired to do it today too. i feel guilty that i’m not awake enough to do more than cook the dog vegies and maybe vacuum the house.

if it really does have something to do with being a WOMAN, do you think it’ll get better with menopause? i live in hope. meantime, A CHEER!!! for pamela who’s letting go!

p.s. did you forget to mention hubbies don’t have much guilt either?